My thoughts on classroom "management"

I can't count the number of times I've heard teachers say, "I really don't care if the kids like me or not. As long as they respect me, it doesn't matter."

Let me ask you this... how many people do you respect that you don't like? I'll go out on a limb and say zero. At least for me, that's true. Middle school students are no different. They will NOT respect you if they don't like you. That being said, you don't have to be their friend - that's not what I mean. But you should be someone they actually want to be around!

My eyes were opened a few years ago by a student named Carlos - and his entire class. That class was a challenge, to say the least. (Which happens to be my favorite kind, but we'll leave that alone for another time!) Anyhow, in that class were a number of kids that every other teacher complained about constantly. For me, however, they were angels! Homework? Done! (And trust me when I say, I give A LOT of homework!) Please and Thank you? Always. Quiet in class? Constantly. They would never DREAM of acting up in my class! We laughed and learned and cheered each other on the whole year! They were some of my favorite kids!

One day, I found out about a stunt Carlos pulled in another room that sent me into a tizzy. The kids were talking about it and he sat over in the corner with a look on his face somewhere between pride and sheer terror. (Proud the kids thought he was so "cool' and scared to death that I knew about it!) I decided to set aside what we were about to do and discuss the reasons why they acted like angels for me and demon spawn the second they walked out my door.

After a lengthy discussion about the thousand and one reasons they're supposed to act a certain way in school and in public, I finally asked them, point-blank, why they turned into little monsters when they left my room. I mean, anyone that knows me knows that my class is not an easy class. I expect A LOT from my kids and accept nothing less than their absolute best. I refuse to tolerate disrespect of any kind, toward anyone. The bar is set VERY high in my class, so if they can reach it with me, why not everywhere else?

Carlos, in all his middle school innocence, simply raised his hand and said, "Ms. M, you love us."

I'm Curious...

So, I've been reading blogs posted from teachers all over the place. One thing seems to be common in the vast majority of them: they complain about EVERYTHING. From their kids and co-workers to their districts and parents... according to their blogs, they all suck!

It's no secret. I love, love, love, love, LOVE my job. I feel most at home in my classroom, in front of a group of crazy, hormone-laden, completely distractable 7th-graders than I do anywhere else. Of course I have difficult days. Of course some of my kids drive me to the brink of insanity. Of course some of my co-workers do things that make me want to go for the jugular. Of course some of the parents make me scratch my head and ask why they even had kids in the first place. However, even after the most challenging of days, there is NOTHING I'd rather do with my life.

I'm finishing my 5th year at my school. In all that time, I've never gone home and said, "I had a BAD day." There has always been SOMETHING good that outweighed the bad of the day. If you can't find the same in your day, consider another profession!